Even if you\u2019re not someone who makes resolutions in the new year, you probably make some general intentions to be \u201cbetter\u201d at something this year. Doing things like eating better, reading more, or exercising more.<\/p>\n
For the first half of January, most people stick to their plans and feel pretty good about their chances of finally keeping their promise to themselves. But then they find themselves starting to waver.<\/p>\n
A missed workout here, a bowl of ice cream there, and by the end of the month they\u2019re back to their normal routines wondering what went wrong.<\/p>\n
Why does this happen and what can you do to make sure it doesn\u2019t happen to you?<\/p>\n
For the first few weeks of January, momentum keeps you sticking to the goals you\u2019ve never stuck to before. The reward system of your brain is firing because you\u2019re achieving success and you feel great. It keeps you moving forward through the first week or two.<\/p>\n
But after awhile, a day of success doesn\u2019t pack the same punch. Your brain isn\u2019t releasing as much dopamine for a job well done and you fall back on willpower and guilt to keep you going. After all, you promised yourself (and maybe a few loved ones) you\u2019d be better and this year you\u2019re going to keep that promise!<\/p>\n
Unfortunately,\u00a0willpower is a limited resource<\/strong>. The more you fight to stay on track, the more willpower gets used up, so eventually when you see that bowl of ice cream or you get too busy to go to the gym, you give in.<\/p>\n You feel guilty, so you try harder. You run out of willpower and give in. And then it happens again. And again. And, well, you get the picture.<\/p>\n Humans have an evolutionary bias toward doing things that are easy or bring pleasure and a tendency to obsess over things they can\u2019t have. These tendencies make forming new habits tricky.<\/p>\n What\u2019s the good news? You can work with your programming and stick to your goals this year. It\u2019s not necessarily easy, but with a few mindset shifts it\u2019s absolutely possible. Even if you\u2019ve never stuck to them before. Even if you\u2019re starting to waver.<\/p>\n Take it from someone who used to binge on frozen pepperoni pizzas every week and now runs a wellness business — you CAN turn your life around for good! \ud83d\ude42 Here are four ways to change how you think about your goals so you can keep tackling them into February and beyond.<\/p>\n In fact, think of them as occasional treats.<\/p>\n When you tell yourself you can\u2019t have something, you start to feel deprived and obsessively think about it. You\u2019ve seen this happen to yourself. For example, you think about food a lot more when you\u2019re \u201cdieting.\u201d<\/p>\n It\u2019s time to get off that hamster wheel of deprivation and obsession. Instead,\u00a0give yourself permission to treat yourself every once in a while to things that your body and mind tell you you really want<\/strong>. By doing so, you\u2019ll take away the power that treat has on you.<\/p>\n And trust that if you really want to go out to dinner or take a day off from the gym that you can. Because nothing bad will happen in the long run, and now you\u2019re playing the long game. Instead of worrying about one little treat and letting the guilt from it snowball you into back-to-back treats and a sense of failure and doom, go back to your new routine and understand that if you even change your behavior to be just 10% more consistent than it was before, that\u2019s a huge win.<\/strong><\/p>\n Every incremental improvement really does add up. Changes don\u2019t need to be extreme or painful to create lasting and dramatic benefits. You see this in practices such as yoga. When you practice yoga, you might feel like nothing\u2019s really changing from day-to-day because you\u2019re not suffering the way you might in a boot camp class, but after months of dedicated practice one day you\u2019ll find yourself easily sliding into poses that were once impossible. Yoga is a great metaphor for any area of your life where you\u2019d like to see change.<\/p>\n No matter what you do, there are going to be days when you feel unmotivated. And it won\u2019t just be one day, but a series of days. Nothing deteriorates your desire to keep moving forward more than a week straight of moving backwards.<\/p>\n But getting off track happens to everyone and isn\u2019t actually as big of a problem as you might think. What really prevents you from reaching your goals is that often at this pivotal point in your journey, you throw in the towel rather than getting back on track.<\/p>\n This is where a plan B comes in handy. Your plan B is what you\u2019ll do to get yourself motivated again<\/strong>\u00a0if you start to go into that downward spiral.<\/p>\n For example, when I don\u2019t feel like doing an intense workout my plan B is to head outdoors for a 45-minute walk. It\u2019s something I always look forward to because it relaxes me to move my body and get some fresh air, and at least I\u2019m getting some physical activity rather than zoning out in front of my laptop. Usually, after a few days of walking, I feel in tune with my body again and am ready to resume my more challenging workouts.<\/p>\n And what about food? If you\u2019re someone who craves sweets, come up with some ideas for sweet whole foods that are incredibly satisfying but aren\u2019t insanely unhealthy. For me, that\u2019s making oatmeal with bananas and drizzling some raw honey on top. Sure, it may not be ideal as eating eggs and veggies, but it\u2019s better than downing chocolate cake and is equally as satisfying for me.<\/p>\n The important thing with food is to make sure that you find a plan B that doesn\u2019t leave you feeling deprived<\/strong>. This usually means that weird diet food substitutes just won\u2019t work. For example, if you really want ice cream, get it. Just get a high quality ice cream made with whole ingredients. It\u2019ll satisfy you and you\u2019ll be doing the best you can to nourish yourself. Whereas a fat free frozen yogurt would probably leave you still wanting that ice cream.<\/p>\n Having a plan B for the things that might throw you off course will allow you to take action as soon as you recognize old patterns settling in. It\u2019ll also give you the chance to really listen to your body and keep yourself from feeling deprived and obsessed about anything. Pretty soon, you\u2019ll be back on your way to meeting your goal. And if you falter again, you just get right back up and keep going.<\/p>\n When you decide that you want to lift weights or read more, you\u2019re not actually looking for sleeker triceps or more information in your brain.\u00a0You\u2019re looking for how those benefits will make you feel<\/strong>: powerful, sexy, confident, intelligent, relaxed, etc. Somewhere along the way, that goal became a representation of that feeling for you.<\/p>\n But the specific actions you take to achieve your goal by themselves are like going to meetings at work. You do them because you have to, but do you really want to be there?<\/p>\n That mentality changes though when there\u2019s purpose and focus for that meeting. Suddenly you know why it\u2019s important to attend. Not only do you want to go, you might even find yourself excited to participate.<\/p>\n The same is true when achieving your goal. The \u201cwhat\u201d by itself might start to feel like a chore after a while. And unfortunately, there\u2019s no one there to make you do it so it\u2019s easy to quit. But focusing on the \u201cwhy\u201d gives your goal a purpose and a reason to get excited<\/strong>. Whatever feeling you\u2019re trying to produce is something you want more of in your life. And this new habit provides that for you, keeping you motivated to reach your goal and continue your habit long after because that feeling is something you\u2019ll always want in your life.<\/p>\n That feeling that you\u2019re looking for is also a great compass to make sure you\u2019re on the right path.<\/p>\n Sometimes we create a goal thinking it will help us feel a certain way, but it doesn\u2019t. For many people, this comes with the idea of being the \u201cperfect weight.\u201d They think it\u2019ll make them happy, but when they reach that goal they find that nothing\u2019s changed. So they either give up (because they haven\u2019t found happiness) or become obsessed with losing more weight (because then they might be happy).<\/p>\n When you\u2019re creating a goal for yourself,\u00a0be brutally honest and ask yourself if what you\u2019re doing is actually giving you that feeling that you\u2019re craving<\/strong>. You should be feeling it throughout the journey of reaching your goal, and not just at the end. If you aren\u2019t, then drop that goal and find a new one that fills you up with what you need.<\/p>\n Because when you want to feel a certain way and you don\u2019t, despite your best efforts, you feel even more deprived and try filling that gap in ways that aren\u2019t great for you, like emotional eating, Netflix binge-watching, self-criticism, or obsession.<\/p>\n For myself, I stopped relying on reaching that “perfect weight” to be happy and instead started dancing, walking in nature, reading fiction, and running a business that helps people feel amazing. I\u2019m not obsessed anymore with calories burned, macros consumed, or what I\u2019ll have to do to counteract the one slice of pizza I\u2019m eating because these other habits bring joy and purpose into my life that I never found in a number on the scale. And without even thinking about it, I eat less and move more naturally, keeping myself healthy and happy without feeling deprived.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Even if you\u2019re not someone who makes resolutions in the new year, you probably make some general intentions to be \u201cbetter\u201d at something this…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":116852274,"featured_media":57,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_coblocks_attr":"","_coblocks_dimensions":"","_coblocks_responsive_height":"","_coblocks_accordion_ie_support":"","_crdt_document":"","advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"_wpas_customize_per_network":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[131],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-56","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-work"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/feedyouraurablog.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/02\/handholdingicecreamcone.jpg?fit=1155%2C1732&ssl=1","jetpack_likes_enabled":false,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p8nXmu-U","jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/feedyouraurablog.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/56","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/feedyouraurablog.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/feedyouraurablog.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/feedyouraurablog.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/116852274"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/feedyouraurablog.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=56"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/feedyouraurablog.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/56\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":58,"href":"https:\/\/feedyouraurablog.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/56\/revisions\/58"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/feedyouraurablog.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/57"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/feedyouraurablog.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=56"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/feedyouraurablog.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=56"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/feedyouraurablog.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=56"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}How to stick to and achieve your goals this year<\/h2>\n
1. Don\u2019t beat yourself up over occasional slips<\/h2>\n
2. Have a plan B for times when you aren\u2019t feeling it<\/h2>\n
3. Visualize how achieving your goal would make you feel<\/h2>\n
4. Find what you\u2019re really looking for<\/h2>\n